Now that I have discovered the appropriate expression of creativity for me, I believe acting will continue to be part of my life and recovery indefinitely. I have mistakenly assumed that my mind is only of the analytical kind; that the most I could create is an analysis of what already exists; that my powers to critique are all I have.
But living in Los Angeles has given me new perspectives. I have been given the chance to create characters from but a few lines or just a vague description. I now see that creation and evolution are within me, as they are in all human beings. In fact, being is all I need to understand going forward.
Life has blessed me with the extreme experiences that lend the actor a hand in the art of sympathy. "No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we see that our experience can benefit others." How would I have been able to enter the emotions of pain suffered by others had I not known pain and suffering myself? How might I tell a story without experience? It is as if the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune in my own life are now the tools of a great storyteller. The literatures and philosophies of college curriculum are now my arsenal of language, emotion, and reference. My politics dictate the tone and message of the moral of the story. My passions are unleashed as I enter the mind of the character, create a life and environs for him or her; and that passion is felt by the audience regardless of their own experiences. Everything happened for a reason unknown to me for so long, but now, what I can and must do, is clear. Why else would I enjoy this occupation as I do? I finally want what sobriety and destiny had in store for me. It took faith, patience, and lots of help to get to the point where my will aligns itself with the Universe. It is a breathtaking view from where I now stand. Thank you.
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